Articles

Foil Table Skirt

In Food and Drink on November 23, 2011 by John Layfield

Does a luau sound good but you’re worried Hawai’i is too close to being foreign? I mean, sure, it’s a state but it’s kind of far. And then there’s international (isn’t that, like, French and English and stuff?) waters surrounding it too. Thank goodness for the All-American table skirt, designed to reassert cultural dominance over those godless natives who make up 10% of the Hawai’ian population.

This may also work as a regular skirt if you’re in drag around homophobes. Hate you or salute? Even I’m not sure.

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One Response to “Foil Table Skirt”

  1. Table skirts in general are fucking unnecessary, right up there with toilet seat covers, so plastering flag colours on them just makes this the single most appropriate post so far.

    Unless, of course, you can find me an American flag toilet seat cover.

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